surefire ways to keep men off your back

1. Tell him you like him back if it doesn’t work try number 2.
2. Tell him you picture yourself marrying him in the near future.
3. You’d love to meet his parents…NOW.
4. Cook for him and make sure it is totally unedible.
5. You just bought a 20M condominium and a Jaguar on loan.  It will take you 20 years to pay the loan unless someone helps you out.
6. Your stinky dog sleeps with you in bed and bites you ferociously if you try to get him off your bed.
7. Tell him you are happily married or engaged to this guy and the only reason he doesn’t see you with him is because he is on the other side of the earth.
8. Burp after a meal.
9. Fart if you can. If you can do it with gusto…much better.
10. Pick your nose in front of him. Roll it in a ball and flick it off your fingers. 
11. Floss your teeth or use a toothpick and make those annoying noise when you pass saliva or air in between your teeth.
12. Chew a gum, blow bubbles and pop it out loud! bang!
13. Pretend that you are a lesbian… really.
14. Now take lots of pictures of him while he is leaving your office or his house.
15. Post everything in your cubicle or in your homepage where he can easily see it.
16. Pretend that you are trying to hide it once he sees it.
17. Go to webmaster or an artist and superimpose your pictures together to someone who is getting married. Write your name under it. “John and Alice Forever. Till’ death do us part.” Make sure that a dagger is beside tht phrase with blood dripping from it. Show it to him.
18. If it still doesnt work, print out a fake wedding invitation with his name and your name on it.
19. If it still doesn’t work…you should consider leaving the country.

eyes wide shut

When the person you are kissing closes his eyes, what does it mean? What does it indicate? When he keeps his eyes open, what does it mean?  

When the person you are making love with keeps his eyes closed while doing the deed what does it mean? When the person you are making love with keeps his eyes open while doing the deed, what  does this mean?

What does it mean? What does it mean?

I learned in school that when someone says “I love you” and looks down…then he is being honest. He is digging deep into his heart and soul on what he wanted to say. Now when a guy says “I love you” and looks up as if he was thinking…then kick his ass out and send him to his over-bearing mother! 

I remember having a classmate in high school who had this snobbish look on her face when she’s listening to you. She would turn her head away from you and look at you from the corner of her eyes. I thought she was such a bitch! Little did I know that she had hearing problems.  Turning her ears closer to the source and  directing her eyes to the source makes her hear better.

Kissing with eyes shut is the proper way to do it. Not that there is an improper way to do it but keeping your eyes closed will make you feel more of what your senses are sending to your brain. Should you decide to keep your eyes open, you enter the risk of not being at the moment and not digging him. Once you open your eyes, you see the world around you and you tend to think of other things rather than concentrating on the task at hand. (I beginning to sound like a man…kissing – a task.) Other scientists have their own hypotheses. Go read theirs if you are interested.

One question though…is it the same if you are kissing and doing the deed ?  My take on this, if the guy kept his eyes shut the whole time, that means he is imagining another partner.

the itch that cannot be scratched